Sunday, March 25, 2012

When I knew.....

Number 14

Last night I attending a concert from the Heartland Mens Chorus called, "When I knew".  Dan Savage was narrating the performance.  Dan Savage is the organizer of the, "It Gets Better" campaign on YouTube.  He read the stories from the chorus and the audience that told the story of bullying, discrimination and coming out.  Each story was moving.

In that same vein, here is my "When I knew" story:

When we moved to the house on the farm there was lost of space and area to explore.  One of those places was the gravel pit.  This is where the city would dig and find gravel for roads, so there were big piles of gravel, indention's in the earth which allowed water to accumulate.  We had a make shift swimming hole (although we did not swim in it much, at least I didn't).  My brother, sister and I would go over there to play all the time.  We would create stories and make-believe all the time.  One thing that I would consistently do is pretend there were mer-folk in the water.  They would come out of the water and visit us.  We would make up names for them all and pretend to have romances.  I would make up names for my mer-men (secretly) and would create in my head a whole romance.  I know that I did not share with anyone about those romances, but I would make up the conventional female names to have romances with outwardly.  This began my internalized homosexual crisis.  It is amazing how society can keep people silent for so long based on norms and values.  That was 35 years ago.......

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