Something has been weighing heavy on my mind for a couple of weeks. As most of you know I have 5 boys. Each of them very different, unique, loving, energetic, fun, and challenging. They have all (so far) followed a pattern. Everything is just all boy until about 11 or 12 then POW!!!! I am caught off guard by their emotional state, pushing limits, finding themselves, finding balance, dealing with hormone (testosterone), and their wonderful belligerence. My boys are really wonderful young men.....just this age is particularly tough for all involved.
I can remember when my oldest would have emotional breakdowns, crying fits, feelings of uselessness, and not liking the people around him. I sat with him on the bathroom floor a couple of times just watching him weep. I remember the next boy hiding for long periods, getting extremely angry, running away (not really that far), and expressing feelings of rage. The 3rd boy is going through the same commotion. The tough part is that I was present for the beginning stage of this change....right now I am not there to help (in a local sense). I skype, text and call as much as possible and as much as he will accept.....but it is tough to personally see this happen from a distance.
Each of the older boys sailed through this experience, relatively, unscathed. My heart REALLY goes out to my 3rd son. I am not available as much for him as I was the others. It is hard to rely on others to assist, but realize that is what will happen. I can't wait to see him this weekend and hope that we can have some very overdue talks and work through his changing life.
I love him.....he turns 12 today!
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